My pet peeve
Beyond a doubt my worst pet peeve is lack of communication!This stems from multiple areas of my life. Everything from vendors to friends to family. People who think that it is acceptable not to respond to emails is my first peeve. My job right now is to fill a craft show with the best vendors I can. I do this as a volunteer and takes many many hours of dealing with people, drafting floor plans, placing vendors so they don’t have an identical vendor next to them, it is all a work in progress usually up to the last week of planning. At first when the applications go out I usually get a ton of applications. I go through them to make sure I have an equal amount of varying crafts and products. When that is done I send emails to confirm, explaining that payment will secure their spot. (and this is indicated on the application form) Some vendors are really great, they either just respond with payment or contact me to say when they will pay. My email and phone number is always available and I have always made it my mission to treat people the way I like to be treated. Good concept right? I go above and beyond what I should be doing but most people that know me, know that is how I am. I just don’t get people lately. In a society that is so socially connected they think that it is OK to ignore instead of stepping up and saying.. “I’m sorry but I am unable to attend” Simple response but they think I have nothing better to do than to chase after them for a response. They treat it like they are too busy to take time to respond but don’t take into consideration that I also am too busy to keep chasing them down for a response. So my solution for this particular problem is. Remove them from the floor plan and move on. No need to explain anymore to them. They don’t have the consideration to contact me, I should not feel guilty about taking them out of the show.
Next…People who use you for their own gain!. I call these people inconsequential friends. (which means they don’t consider you important or significant unless they need you for something). Unfortunately I have run into lots of these people during my 64 years. Seriously it takes me a bit to realise this but in the end it usually hits me and I think “Holy crap I did it again” . A good example is, I contacted someone who I considered a friend on Facebook, to meet up for a coffee. Well I don’t know if this person realises that I see when they read the Private Message or not ( or maybe they just don’t give a damn). So, the message was read but this person didn’t have the decency to even respond with, ‘sorry can’t make it” or.. “you suck so I don’t want to meet for coffee” or “I only friended you because I hoped that your relationship was not good and I could swoop in” or “You called me on my fabricated stories, exaggerated stories and outright lies and now I can’t be around you because you know the truth”. Either way I gave it the 48 hour rule (wait 48 hours before you act or respond) then I promptly deleted this person from my list. There are many more recounted stories of this type of problem but I won’t get into it right now. I am sure you have your own accounts and honestly I would love to hear them if you want to respond to this post.
The next one is the exclusion from family matters. I like to keep to myself, not one to blat out there everyday about how my life is going. No one else’s business and I am sure that no one out there really cares if you had coffee and yogurt for breakfast, right? I don’t get the “I have to post something on my news feed or my day is not complete even if it is stupid or boring”
opps strayed off the tracks for a bit, sorry about that.
Well anyway, that doesn’t mean that I don’t care or I don’t get hurt when this type of thing happens. One in particular comes to mind when family events happen but. “oh I thought I told you” or “Honestly it just slipped my mind” or “I didn’t think you would be interested.” Seriously. I live a short drive away and it seems like it is too much bother to even think or ask? Like I said, communication. I have done everything I could to keep in contact, and to what end! Missing activities because I didn’t find out about it until I see the pictures posted on Facebook truly hurts. I realise now that I was more than likely purposely excluded (not sure why and not sure I really care at this point) I could read a lot into why but honestly it is not worth my time and effort to explain this behaviour. At one point I tried for 3 weeks to coincide a good time to drop off a gift when every date seemed to be an inconvenient time. Seriously? Karma will bite the hand that feeds it and I will just sit back and watch.
So in conclusion, treat people with respect and kindness. If a confidence is given to you, respect it and don’t spread it around. If a trust is given to you, wrap it up gently and store it away as it is truly a gift to have someone trust you. Treat friendship like a good wine, savour it and make it last.
Communication is the key in the end. It only takes a minute of your time to respond to someone, or to treat them with kindness. Pay it forward daily. Wave and smile at an unsuspecting stranger, it could be the brightest spot in their miserable day. Send someone a Private message telling them that you are thinking of them and just wanted to say hello.
What is your pet Peeve? let me know. I would love to hear your stories.